Phungal Inphection

A lady came into the pharmacy late one night, brunette, skimpy clothes, rather tatty looking and was immediately served by a pharmacy assistant at the counter. Without any regard to her own privacy, says, "Can I have some Canesten please? My pussy is sore."

While speaking, she held her hands down near her crotch and began writhing her body as if she needed to go to the toilet. The assistant, a little surprised by the openness of this woman began following the protocols for such a request, "What symptoms do you have at the moment?"

"My pussy is sore. Please, I do like 20 guys a night! I need some Canesten," she replied while still writhing at the counter.

"Uh... ok. Do you have any itching?" The assistant asked

"Yes."

"Any discharge?"

"A little."

"What colour is the discharge? Is it white and cottage cheese like or a different colour?"

"It's white. Please! My pussy is sore! I need to work!" The woman, which can confidently be called a hooker now, continues to squirm.

The assistant, having received just enough information from the woman, shows her the range of Canesten products we supply and suggests the once pessary and cream. "You shouldn't 'work' until the infection's gone and see a Doctor if it doesn't clear," the assistant added.

"I know what I'm doing," The woman retorted, "Thanks."

The assistant put the sale through the register and the woman then left the premises.

For those unfamiliar and those that didn't notice I had already included links to Canesten in the story, more information on Canesten can be found here: Canesten. Oh, and a bit about vaginal thrush, also known as vaginal yeast infection, can be found from the global Canesten website here: Vaginal Yeast Infection.

Business Oriented Phloozy

I've come to notice most of my stories are strongly related to sex and seem to always happen at night. Well this story is no exception, except, it happened during the day...

A blonde lady came into the pharmacy during the day wearing a very skimpy outfit - short skirt, boob tube, high heeled shoes, stomach showing and her skin heavily tanned. Basically, when you look at this woman the first thing that would come to mind is, hooker.

Without being judgemental, I asked her if she required any assistance, to which she indicated she did not. While she continued to shop, some other ladies arrived for pharmacist intervention, and the way they were holding hands, both with very short hair, I presumed they were lesbians.

Just on a side note, as Pharmacists we may make a lot of assumptions and judgements about clients, but we do not discriminate, well I know I don't! I have heard of situations where that has occurred, but more on that another time.

Again, without judgement, I served the other two ladies who requested period pain medication. Meanwhile, the blonde lady goes to pay for her items, and because I was already occupied, my boss assisted her.

After the usual process, I go to process the sale for the presumed 'lesbians' on the same computer that my boss just used to complete the sale for the blonde lady. As I put through the sale with my boss standing next to me, the blonde lady directly in front and the presumed 'lesbians' to the right, the blonde lady hands me a business card and says to me, "Here, you might like to visit me sometime."

I study the card she has just given me and notice a picture of a woman from the mid-section down showing her back, behind and legs wearing an extremely short blue skirt, of which is so short it showed her g-string in the same colour blue. There was also the address and a phone number for a brothel!

The business card confirmed she was a call girl - my initial judgement was therefore correct! She just offered me sex in the pharmacy!!!

Knowing my boss and the presumed 'lesbians' have seen this occur and have most likely come to the same conclusion, I say, "no thanks," and give the card back. I finish the transaction with the presumed 'lesbians' and return to the dispensary where my boss is already telling the story to another pharmacist.

My boss mentions the blonde also bought sea sponges, which confirmed to him that she was a prostitute. If you don't know how the sea sponges are related to working girls, refer to this earlier post: To Ex-pholiate or Phornicate?

He then asked a rhetorical question, "Why didn't she offer me the card? I was the one serving her! Maybe she saw my wedding ring?"

Maybe she just wanted a young, intelligent, good-looking client for once? ;)

To Ex-pholiate or Phornicate?

Well, then, with the introduction out of the way I might as well tell you something vaguely interesting.

When I first begun my intern-ship, one thing that I noticed and was often commented on by other staff was the turnover of a fairly simple product in the late night pharmacy I trained in. This pharmacy was located in a busy inner city suburb near a few night clubs/pubs. In fact it was so close to one pub that it felt like we were front stage for their Thursday night karaoke night (obviously only on Thursday nights).

Anyway, back to the story at hand.

This product, originally derived from the sea, now mostly synthetic (although I believe the ones we sold were natural) was a simple sea sponge. These products were generally sought after by your average female (but not necessarily) to use as a sponge to clean and ex-foliate, but there was something sinister and not right about them. People, let alone women in the local area couldn't need that many sponges, could they?

As it turns out they could! And my view of the people in the local area was very innocent. Elderly people and business workers came in during the day, but at night, the whole scene changed. One of our most common late night clientele, the ever so 'elegant' 'ladies of the evening' purchased these sea sponges like an obese man purchases chocolate!

Ok, so now I had figured out who was purchasing all of the sponges, but I needed to know why! I compare it to the time I went to see the Matrix. With a tag-line like "What is the Matrix?" I had to find out what it was!

So late one night, a 'lady of the evening' (also known as bawd, call girl, concubine, courtesan, fallen woman, floozy, harlot, hooker, hustler, moll, nymphomaniac, painted, streetwalker, strumpet, whore, woman of the streets, working girl - I mean no disrespect, these are the names the internet gives them) purchased 5 of these sponges from me. My curiosity got the better of me and I asked, "Why do you need so many sponges?"

To which she retorted, "So I can f*ck while I'm bleeding!"

WHOLLY SH!T!!!

So these ladies would insert the sponge deep into their vagina so they didn't lose a nights pay because of their menstrual period! And an even funnier thing, their clientele had no idea! That's saying a 'little' about their clientele. Pun intended.

I guess after all that, it's just good business...