iPhagina

Early one afternoon, a young, blonde woman approached the busy pharmacy counter and asked a female assistant if she could speak to the pharmacist about an issue her friend had. She mentioned that her friend had a rash and had sent a picture via sms to the young, blonde woman's iphone. My young assistant approached me at the dispensary counter to notify me that a lady was waiting, her friend had a rash and she had a picture of it on her phone.

It was quite a busy moment and I had to pass the message on that I would finish the prescriptions I was preparing. The blonde woman patiently waited five minutes for me to dispense and counsel my current client.

Upon finalising the sale, I approached the young, blonde woman and asked, "So, your friend has a rash?"

The blonde woman pulled out her iphone while explaining that her friend was too embarrassed to seek help herself, but obviously not so embarrassed that she could send a friend in to show me the photo. The picture, as it happens, was a lady's vagina, shaven, with a small tuft of blonde hair around the top of the labia and an indiscernible rash in-between her bottom 'lips' and the shadow of her right leg.'Oh... that's why it's embarrassing,' was my first thought.

You may be thinking that my second thought was, 'This lady is blonde. The (limited) hair I see in this photo is blonde. It's probably just her own pussy!'

Instead, being a guy, I was thinking, 'Don't smile. Don't laugh. Don't smile. Don't laugh. Don't smile. Don't laugh... ' And much of the reason I found this situation funny, aside from the unexpected private parts, and my gender, was remembering back a few months earlier. Another assistant at the same pharmacy had a similar situation where a woman showed a phone picture of her infected pussy, to which the assistant replied, "Umm... you should probably see a doctor..." Then complained in a hilarious manner, once all customers had left, that she doesn't work in a pharmacy to look at people's private parts. Go to the doctor when it's that bad! You really had to be there... it was quite a funny response...

During the current exchange, I managed, with great difficulty, to remain professional and indicated that the picture was of poor quality and I couldn't really diagnose the rash. The blonde woman's 'friend' should go to the doctor to have it properly examined.

While we were discussing this, the blonde woman's 'friend' sent another, clearer image, somewhat proving it wasn't the woman's genitals standing before me and most likely a real friend without the inverted commas. This new image showed some possible blisters, but it was still too difficult to tell. From the information gathered and the poor quality photos, I believed the most likely cause of the rash to be herpes. Again, I referred her to the doctor, denoting, as herpetic rashes are cause by a virus, that we had nothing over the counter to help treat it and that it is always best practice to have the doctor examine the rash to ensure an accurate diagnosis. I also mentioned that the doctor could write a prescription for antiviral therapy that could assist, another reason she should see the doctor.

The young, blonde woman finally left after I had handed her a list of doctors her friend could visit. Then I was able to let my facial muscles express what they had wanted to do the whole conversation, "Hahahahaha..." Such relief!

Phungal Inphection

A lady came into the pharmacy late one night, brunette, skimpy clothes, rather tatty looking and was immediately served by a pharmacy assistant at the counter. Without any regard to her own privacy, says, "Can I have some Canesten please? My pussy is sore."

While speaking, she held her hands down near her crotch and began writhing her body as if she needed to go to the toilet. The assistant, a little surprised by the openness of this woman began following the protocols for such a request, "What symptoms do you have at the moment?"

"My pussy is sore. Please, I do like 20 guys a night! I need some Canesten," she replied while still writhing at the counter.

"Uh... ok. Do you have any itching?" The assistant asked

"Yes."

"Any discharge?"

"A little."

"What colour is the discharge? Is it white and cottage cheese like or a different colour?"

"It's white. Please! My pussy is sore! I need to work!" The woman, which can confidently be called a hooker now, continues to squirm.

The assistant, having received just enough information from the woman, shows her the range of Canesten products we supply and suggests the once pessary and cream. "You shouldn't 'work' until the infection's gone and see a Doctor if it doesn't clear," the assistant added.

"I know what I'm doing," The woman retorted, "Thanks."

The assistant put the sale through the register and the woman then left the premises.

For those unfamiliar and those that didn't notice I had already included links to Canesten in the story, more information on Canesten can be found here: Canesten. Oh, and a bit about vaginal thrush, also known as vaginal yeast infection, can be found from the global Canesten website here: Vaginal Yeast Infection.

Dirty Phingers

A young couple of central Asian descent came into the pharmacy late one night requesting the morning after pill, also known as emergency contraception. The girl filled out the questionnaire as required and the pharmacist begun to counsel her. At the time I was still an intern pharmacist, but was able to witness this interaction first hand.

While the pharmacist was counselling, the boyfriend interrupted and asked, "Is it possible to get pregnant if you cum on your hands then put your fingers into your girlfriends pussy?"

The pharmacist replies, "It's very unlikely, you'd have to put your fingers up a fair way into the vagina, but I guess it could be possible."

Meanwhile, the girl says to her boyfriend, "Come on! Lets go. we don't need it."

The boyfriend continues, "What if you come on your hands 4 hours before then put your fingers into your girlfriend?"

"You came on your hands and didn't wash them for 4 hours?!?!" The pharmacist replied in shock. "Get out of here, you don't need it!"